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Home Olympics

Mike Copper: Olympics should pass again to the future

Emmett Stevenson by Emmett Stevenson
May 15, 2025
in Olympics
0

Breakdancing may be brought to the Games. There’s additionally a push for the Summer Olympics to offer out medals for ballroom dancing. So, sometimes you listen to stray workplace banter that can’t be neglected.

The “area” is that rare instance in which my mind catches a green mile. If personally lucky, that doesn’t show up while I’m within the “region” as a way of writing. Copy freely flows from cortex to keyboard. Everything else is white noise. Until a person enunciates a string of phrases that, without problems, overrides such locked-in concentration. Someone we’ll call Erie Times-News co-worker Tony Battaglia, who had to know I would react while he stated: “Breakdancing will be delivered to the Summer Olympics.” Got your attention, too.

That’s right. Major news organizations are reporting that organizers of the 2024 Games in Paris are pushing for that staple of the Eighties way of life to be a medal sport by way of then. Now, earlier than I put up my list of different pseudo-Olympic sports from the Yuppie Decade, please recognize that an international breakdancing competition isn’t as out-of-the-blue as it sounds. There are a few valid points to it. Breakdancing, or “breaking,” as the “children” want to “say,” turned into part of the 2018 Youth Olympic Games in Argentina. The winners had been Japan’s Ramu “Ram” Kawai and Russia’s Sergei “Bumblebee” Chernyshev. There’s additionally a push for the Summer Olympics to give out medals for ballroom dancing. That’s notably different from the couples who waltz on ice throughout the Winter Olympics, so I’ll give them that a lot. Here’s the trouble. If we add breakdancing to the Olympics, what anachronistic occasions from 30-plus years ago are subsequent?

How approximately

Boom Boxing: The competition enjoys no physical touch inside the ring. Instead, the winner is the only one whose Promax Super Jumbo version flattens his opponent with an audio barrage of Herbie Hancock instrumentals cranked up to eleven. High hair leap: Let’s see how the Dick Fosbury of the sector would fare looking to avoid clipping the bar with 2-foot manes of lash follicles. Channel browsing: Why no longer? Thanks to cable TV, it’s the last decade that gave beginning to twitchy thumbs. Karate Kidding: The winner is the one who’s fastest to wax on, wax off all the cars within the arena’s car parking zone. One hundred-meter mullet: Business in the front. The last birthday party was in the back. Rubik’s Cubing: Two phrases: wrist steroids. Valleygirlball: It’s now not, like, volleyball! Totally! It’s like a distinctive sport for sure!

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Emmett Stevenson

Emmett Stevenson

Definitive quicksand optimist. Smartass.Food buff. Social media evangelist. Subtly charming coffee lover. Tv maven. Falls down a lot.

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Got a Tokyo Olympic price tag? Unrivaled call for reasons turmoil

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